Sunday, January 10, 2016

Chasing the Cheese After-Party

I got a professional spa facial yesterday.

I've never done that before. But there was this 2-for-1 deal and my face was all caked in who knows what humidity-induced nonsense from my recent trip to Panama (! pictures soon). So anyway, it seemed like a good idea. And it was a good idea. I never wanted to leave that happy room.

So I got all philosophical whilst zenning out under the little steam blaster thing with some kind of papaya(?) enzyme smeared all over my facial-dermis (clearly I paid attention to the terminology). (Well on the non-philosophical side, I thought about how I probably need to wear face sunscreen more.)

But back to metaphors. Let's call it...mental/emotional exfoliation. (If I ever try and sell a book with that name, remind me that I sound like a idiot.) But the *idea* I like: sloughing off the things that are only bringing you down, to make room for the new and better and healthier. And the new year is a great time to do that.

Last year sort of felt like that downhill cheese race.

You know -- the one where people chase a cheese wheel down a steep hill but really they all end up falling and just tumbling about. (See here.) One minute you're like, "Ooh fun! Cheese!" and the next you're violently cartwheeling (what if I list that as an interest in my dating profiles? "violent cartwheeling"?) with your feet over your head and you know the cheese is SOMEWHERE but really you're not in control at that point and you're just praying nothing permanent or important gets broken. (Maybe I WILL sell a motivational book someday called Chasing the Cheese: The Violent Cartwheels of Life. That's how I'll make my millions.)

I feel in the mood right now to do things....differently. The thing about undergoing major life/mindset changes (see: the last couple years of my life) is that there's the whole tumultuous part of it (see: chasing the cheese) (see: my recap of 2015) and then there's the relief part of it (sitting at the bottom of the hill just breathing and poking around to assess the damage) and then there's the....the what next part. The part where you figure out what YOU want to do and what YOU really think about this or that.

January seems to be all about cleaning up.

Taking down holiday decor, wiping the slate clean, setting goals, zenning out under face know, the usual. And I'm no exception right now. My MBA program starts in a little over 2 months, so I'm currently just....on deck. Next at bat. Free to plan my moves and strategize and flex my muscles a bit and figure out what's most important for me to spend my time on.

For one, reading more. For another, writing more. And making more phone calls to my people. And exercising in a healthy way that reflects a desire and not an obligation. And worrying less about sustaining relationships that don't sustain me. And managing my money a bit better. And, for the first time in my life, not being afraid of online dating (how many apps are out there now? eleventy? bring it on) and trying new tactics/patterns that are more confidence-based and less anxiety-based. And making a real effort at work-life balance and improved assertiveness. And continuing to give myself permission and trust my gut and feeling guilty about...absolutely nothing at all...because I like myself and I like my choices.

And, of course, wearing face sunscreen every day.

1 comment:

Emily said...

Ah Katie - I like you. I love that you can make an ordinary experience something interesting and transcendent - AND that you then write about it. I often have similar experiences but then fail to jot it down and it seems to then slowly slips out of my memory.