Monday, July 23, 2012

a spiritual awakening

this is another link-up to the weekly journal prompt,
via the lovely and endearing harley & jane.
catch my previous entry here.

this week's theme:
a spiritual awakening

i have quite a few to choose from,
but here's what i finally settled on...

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"i guess i just want to be good."
the words were his, not mine.

perched on a log by a campfire,
wrapped in a plaid blanket,
his knee leaning against mine,
the hum of 10 other conversations buzzing around us.

it was summer in utah.
i'd known him for a week,
but it was one of those things,
where conversation just spills out of you with a mind of its own.

and so we talked.
we talked and talked.

i can't remember what i asked him,
but i do remember his answer.

"i guess i just want to be good."

fresh out of my teenage years,
when everyone wanted to be a little edgy,
a little rebellious,
a little bit bad...
his words were new to me.

he wanted to be good.
he wanted that lifestyle.
he wanted that reputation.

the fire popped and i shuffled my sneakers in the dust.
and i decided.

i wanted to be good, too.

i later found this inspired quote,
which, when i heard it,
the words stole into my soul and simply said:

"yes. that's it right there. that's who you need to be."

"I will not consent to any influence from the adversary. I have come to know what power he has. I know all about that. But I also have come to know the power of truth and of righteousness and of good, and I want to be good. I'm not ashamed to say that -- I want to be good. And I've found in my life that it has been critically important that this was established between me and the Lord so that I knew that He knew which way I committed my agency. I went before Him and said, 'I'm not neutral, and you can do with me what you want. If you need my vote, it's there. I don't care what you do with me, and you don't have to take anything from me because I give it to you -- everything, all I own, all I am,' and that makes the difference."
Boyd K. Packer

just a little moment of decision,
by a campfire,
at age 19.

and it somehow ended up meaning everything.

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i love how many of you participated last week!
go check out harley & jane's entries,
and then link up your own!

looking forward to reading.

awake,
katilda
 
Harley & Jane

4 comments:

Jane said...

Very cool. They always tell you in Primary and YW to make the decision, just decide now. Decide who you want to be and how you will act in certain situations. Good for you.

xo

Katie said...

Beautiful.

jimmylou said...

beaaaaaaautiful. love this <3

The Ballard Family said...

Sounds like a refreshing conversation to have at any point in your life. I love it. And that quote. Let us be good together. ...also, very nice writing.