Thursday, November 8, 2012

the post-date text: yes or no?

last night i received a very important conference call,
from two friends with a ponderous question for me:

"what are the rules for a post-date text?"

i've actually had this discussion with other friends before.
should you text and say thank you after a date?
does it depend on if you had fun or not?
or is it just common courtesy?
or maybe an old-fashioned phone call the next day is the way to go?
and is it the boy's or the girl's job?


my take on it?
i've always thought, as a girl, that if the guy had planned the entire date, then i shouldn't be demanding that he keep doing all the initiating.

i personally only send the post-date text if i want to go out with the fella again.

of course i always say thank you in person, regardless of interest level.
but that post-date text...
to me that says, "i dig you and want to see you again."

what do YOU think?

this is definitely a millennial conversation,


chrissyblake said...

Im a big fat sissy and always hope that the boy will text me. I totally agree with you though.. If you've got the cahones to send it. Doooo it :)

Jayme said...

I agree, if you want to see him again, send the text. But sending the text just to be polite or say thanks when you don't want to see him again? That's a no-no to me.

Tyson J Oliver said...

I completely agree with you, but I would add that it must be the next day. Or two days, if you don't want the guy to be toooo confident.

Autumn @ Autumn All Along said...

Maybe I'm even more old school, but I would just tell the guy at the end of the date when he is dropping you off something along the lines of: "I really enjoyed the date (and then tell them something you liked about it). I would love if you asked me again."

I did that my senior year of college because I was tired of waiting around for guys to ask me out again. When the guys did call back I thought it was great and when they didn't I already knew they weren't interested if they hadn't set up something again.

Chantel said...

Agreed with you 1,000,000 times over!! It's funny because I JUST had this conversation with my roommate the other night!

Unknown said...

I HATE THE AFTER DATE TEXTING RULES. hahaha. I never know what to do! Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. And it doesn't even matter if I had fun or not. Also it kinda depends on our "texting relationship". Like, if we text a lot I'll usually send him something after about like "I don't think I'll ever be hungry again that was so good! Thanks again for the meal and company!" Something like that. But if we really only have talked in person I don't... IDK! I never know.

FWIL Sentimental Blog Content said...

I had a 2 date rule back in the day (the single day, about 3 years ago). After the 2nd date I'd text, and maybe even ask him out. I played the shy, go-ahead-and-chase-me game. Most the guys I actually liked and respected were super old fashioned and they let me know too much from a girl is a turn off. But, after a few friendly hang outs or chats and two official dates from him, I was all about the thank you in person and then again in text, and hey, it's my turn to invite you rule.

Unknown said...

Ditto. I definitely do the after date text if I want another date, but if not, I feel like a thank you at the doorstep is good enough.

Michael Hunter said...

I won't take the girl out again if I don't get an after date text or she says she wants to go out again at the doorstep. Unless... I reeeeallly dig her. Maybe that's why I'm still single.