Wednesday, August 15, 2012

how to love yourself without hating other people ▲

Another working title for this blog post might be,
"how NOT to have self esteem"

Let's start with the fact that I almost liked this inspirational meme until the part in yellow:

Dearest creator of this poster,
who cares what your skinny roommate is doing?
what does that have to do with your body?

I've written about this topic before,

it's rare to find someone who's able to eloquently state their opinions these days without using hate or insult or comparison to get their point across.

you want to be a stay-at-home mom?
awesome. that doesn't make working women the enemy.
are you curvy and not a size 2?
awesome. that doesn't make skinny girls the enemy.
you want to be republican?
awesome. that doesn't make democrats the enemy.
you want to go to hogwarts?
awesome. that doesn't make death eaters the...

no wait, i take that last part back.

the point is,
a self-esteem that's built on tearing others down to make yourself feel good about your own life isn't healthy self-esteem at all.

it's actually just childish.

i think it takes someone with true class and intelligence to be able to defend their own position simply on its good merits, without needing to insult the other side to do so.

try this approach:
stop worrying what everyone else is doing that's different than you, and you might finally end up happy and at peace with your own life.

you can be like this majestic stallion,
galloping regally in the wind with your blinders on:


because, seriously, who doesn't want to be a majestic stallion?

now let's all hold hands and practice the phrase,
"i think i'm right and that doesn't make you satan."

free-love hippie blog post,


Ashley Eliza said...

BEAUTIFULLY SAID. I couldnt have said it better myself :) so glad i saw this post. i was def needing to hear this today. thanks, girl!


Kylie said...

THANK YOU! I like your little political insight there too :) I'm so tired of people being so judgemental of others...and me.

Unknown said...

oh, I totally agree!!!!!
{I love your posts, they always make me laugh (: the Harry Potter reference was the best...}

thanks for this post, so true.

xx, Abi

Elisabeth Gee said...

You are SO right, Katie!! (Katilda? I feel like Katilda is more appropriate, but your real name is Katie. Hmmm.) I really need to practice this more. :) Thanks!

katilda said...

as much as i wanted to get this more-serious topic off my chest...the HP reference was probably my favorite part too, haha

Alexis Kaye said...

I love this Katie. How about you travel the world and give motivating talks? I have a problem with SO many things on that poster. The focus is on vanity, not being healthy. The priority should ALWAYS be health. Last night I taught a nutrition class for a relief society activity. One of the women comes in and right away says, "oh, and here's the weight loss class!" And I was like "Actually, we're not talking about weight loss at all. This is about nutrition and treating our bodies right." Then she said something like "You mean weight loss. It's always about weight loss." It's kind of sad that some DON'T understand. Or become obsessed with being a size TWO because that's what magazines say. I probably shouldn't, but I just get irritated. I think it's a messed up way of thinking and I wish I could change it.

Jana said...

One of my biggest pet peeves is people who spend their whole lives fighting AGAINST things. it makes me think how little talent/skill/inspiration it takes to destroy. I would much rather spend my life with people fighting FOR something. Some people (those who oppose me politically from time to time among others) have views that are mutually exclusive with mine, and fighting for what I think is right will sometimes hurt their cause, and vice versa, but as long as we are all trying to build something, I think we will end up with a better world. (Does that make any sense?)

Emily said...

On one hand, I can see how it's frustrating for those who really have to work for their figure and then they have friends who eat whatever they want, don't work out, and gain nothing. BUT, you have a totally valid point. This does not make said "skinny" person the enemy!
Can't we all just agree that fitness pictures with "inspiring" quotes are too cheesy and just not?

katilda said...'re saying i should take the poster off my ceiling that says "there is no i in team"? bahaha....jk. i see what you mean about it probably being frustrating to see someone get what you want w/o appearing to work for it. i have probably felt that way in other areas of my life when things come easily to other people that i just can't seem to get a handle on! an interesting point of view.

Autumn @ Autumn All Along said...

I LOVE this. It is sad that women really are meant to have a sisterhood, but instead we seem to be tearing down the institution at the same time.

This is something I've had to work on myself. I used to have so many opinions on how things should be and shouldn't and it has been so liberating to realize EVERYONE is different and I'm happy we are!

katilda said...

oh i am sometimes guilty of needing to practice what i preach as well! i think writing it out helped me realize i want to be better in this area too :)

Chantel said...

YEAH! LOVE IT! (Do I seem creepy yet? Is it obvious that I'm clearly blog stalking you? Is it odd for me to say that I really really wish I could be your real-life friend?). Right here: "i think it takes someone with true class and intelligence to be able to defend their own position simply on its good merits, without needing to insult the other side to do so." YYYEEEESSSS! I'm a huge proponent.

Becca said...

Love it! Promote what you love instead of bashing on what you hate! Awesome! Also, death eaters..I literallly laughed right out loud at that! Congratulations for being so dang funny! Your blog gives me these random outbursts of laughter. Can't say I don't like it. Trust me..I do! Haha.

marilynwalker said...

Maybe I missed something, but was it really insulting to skinny girls to have to work out twice as much as them? The poster didn't indicate that they were cussing out their skinny roommates, or flipping them off while they run out the door to the gym. As someone who was once very overweight, and worked my butt off to become healthier, this yellow box saying resonated with me. Because I had a skinny roommate, and I never felt hatred towards her, but I also recognized that I was going to have to work significantly harder than her to maintain myself. Skinny girls weren't the enemy, they still aren't the enemy, and they never will be. The real battle in the fight against body image always has been, and always will be, ourselves. I'm sorry that you feel judged by curvy girls, but I honestly think it's just a motivational poster.

katilda said...

You make a good point -- it probably is honest that some people have to work out twice as much. I just think there's a problem in even worrying what other people are doing when it comes to working out. It just brings in a comparison factor that bothers me and seems counterproductive.

chrissyblake said...

Oh my gosh.. We are best friends. Right now. Thats all :) I have been creepin all morning after your lovely comment on my blog. You are briliant and I like that. :) I see some kind of get together or lunch or some other fantastic meet up in your future. with me. In AZ. :) Thanks for keepin it real.

Megan said...

This post is amazing. And I struggle with comparing and in turn definitely get jealous/upset over other people's successes. So this post really resonated with me and gave me a good wake up call. You are a BRILLIANT writer!! I love your blog so much!!